Words Matter - Creating Your Breastfeeding Experience

Chapters

A glance at this episode:

• [1:31] Jacqueline introduces herself
• [6:54] What you’ll hear in the Breastfeeding Talk Podcast
• [10:48] How mindset impacts breastfeeding
• [16:03] How to use the information in this podcastN
• [17:24] Find more from Holistic Lactation®

Transcript

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:00:00];

Hi, I'm Jacqueline Kincer and for the past five years, I've been helping families all around the globe to overcome their breastfeeding challenges. And this is the first non clinical breastfeeding podcast that shows you how to rock breastfeeding and master motherhood through practical tips, mindset shifts, and honest conversation to create a confident and empowering.

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:00:30];

Breastfeeding journey. This is the breastfeeding talk podcast. Welcome to episode one of the breastfeeding talk podcast. I am your host, Jacqueline Kincer, and I'm so excited to start you off with this inaugural episode of the podcast. And I wanted to just kind of give you an overview in this episode of what to expect from the podcast, who this podcast is really speaking to, the three pillars of the things that I'm going to be discussing with you over the next several episodes, and just a little treat for you at the end.

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:01:07];

So I encourage you to stay to the end, and if you have not done this already, I Make sure you're subscribed to this podcast so that you can get all the new episodes because this is just a starter episode, just to again, introduce you to myself and the podcast. So if you want to make sure you're catching all the new episodes, hit subscribe, and you'll be sure to get those automatically updated whenever they come out.

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:01:31];

So first I wanted to start you off with just Introducing myself. So if you don't know me already, obviously, again, my name is Jacqueline and I'm an international board certified lactation consultant. That is a mouthful. So you can just use a short little acronym, which is actually kind of a long acronym because it's five letters, but it's IBCLC.

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:01:53];

And if you've ever, you know, looked into anything breastfeeding or lactation related, you've probably heard that term IBCLC. So, uh, and if you get the letters mixed up, no worries, people do it all the time. The other credential I have is I'm a Certified Specialist in Oral Facial Myology, which is basically a fancy way of saying that I'm an expert in people's oral function.

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:02:15];

Now that includes tongue movement, lip movement, cheek movement, swallowing, jaw movement, breathing, posture, things of that nature. You might commonly hear of this referred to as a Myofunctional Therapist. Uh, so I, I do that work as well. And as part of that work, one of the major specialties that I've had in my practice, really ever since I opened it, is tongue and lip ties as well as buckle ties.

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:02:41];

Collectively, Those things are called either ties or just tethered oral tissue, but I like ties because it's one word and it's not a mouthful. And for anybody who's tongue tied, you're going to have a hard time saying all these acronyms all the time. So, uh, and maybe one day I'll even share my own little tongue tied journey with you guys, my own personal me, myself journey, uh, which is you know, very interesting, I suppose.

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:03:07];

Um, but other things about me, I'm a mom of two. I became a mom in 2013 with my son, and I had my daughter three years later in 2016. So they're wonderful, amazing children, and they actually are the ones who propelled and started me on this path. My son specifically. So when I gave birth to him, I was actually a stockbroker.

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:03:31];

I did not have any career aspirations to become a healthcare provider, or to really be obsessed with breastfeeding in any way, shape, or form. And, you know, I was pregnant with him, I just planned on breastfeeding, figured I would, and I did. But I had so many challenges, especially in the first two months with breastfeeding him.

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:03:52];

And these weren't the normal breastfeeding challenges, But I find that probably a lot of moms would say these things that happened to me were normal. And that's actually going to be the topic of the next episode. So I'll make sure you stay tuned for that one because I don't want to get into that too much here, but there's a difference between things that are common and things that are normal.

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:04:14]];

Those aren't the same thing. They don't mean the same thing. So it's actually a big topic and episode number two. So make sure you're subscribed and you listen to that episode as well. So. I struggled. I also did not have a community of mom friends. So I had my mom, but I didn't have any sisters. I didn't have really any aunts or anybody I was close to like that.

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:04:34];

So I had to sort of create my own mom group. I didn't have one. And I started out with Just meeting people, at parks, at the library, wherever moms and babies were, and I started to learn where moms and babies hung out. I learned what places it was acceptable to bring your baby and breastfeed them and what places it was not.

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:04:56];

And by the way, we will cover this on an episode for sure, but you're allowed to breastfeed pretty much wherever you want, so let's just leave that there. But, uh, some people You know, it's, it's, it cannot be, it's not every location, I guess I'll say, is conducive to breastfeeding, so we'll put it that way.

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:05:15];

Um, but I really ventured out in the world and found my community, and I started off with, I think, 12 or 15 moms where we made an official moms group. And over the next few years, it had grown to a few thousand members, which was just crazy. So I was supporting these moms During that time, I became a La Leche League leader, then I ultimately got my certification as a lactation educator.

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:05:38];

And that sort of whet my appetite and I decided to go full bore and become a board certified lactation consultant. So I spent a couple years getting my 1000 clinical hours that I had to get. Uh, that was really an amazing, incredible journey with a toddler in tow. And I sat for my boards. Four weeks after my daughter was born opened my practice a couple months later, and I've been practicing on my own ever since.

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:06:08];

So, that's how I got to where I am. Now, before anybody starts to, you know, I already kind of mentioned, you know, struggles with my son breastfeeding. Uh, I had way more struggles with my daughter. And all I have to say about that, which I'll probably share sprinkled in here and there in some episodes, and maybe I'll do an entire episode on my own journey.

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:06:27];

Um, but as I'm so grateful that I have the knowledge and support that I did with my daughter, because had I not, I don't know how I could have even really made it through that postpartum period intact with my sanity, let alone continued breastfeeding her. So, um, if you think that I am a lactation consultant and I just know everything about breastfeeding and it's just been perfect and easy for me, no.

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:06:54;

It has not been. Uh, in fact, It being hard is why I'm here today, because if it was easy for me, I probably just would have gone back to my career as a stockbroker and you wouldn't be hearing from me now. Um, and I've dealt with so many things, and this is probably just a short list, but oversupply, low supply, tongue ties, lip ties, buckle ties.

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:07:13];

Um, you know, breastfeeding pain, nipple damage, uh, colicky babies, reflux babies, food intolerances, postpartum mood issues, um, you know, losing the baby weight easily, not losing it at all. Uh, Gosh, the sleep deprivation, I mean, so, so many things, honestly, um, mastitis, plug decks. Oh goodness. You know, we could, we could talk about not being able to pump, um, so many things that I have personally dealt with.

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:07:43];

And of course I've guided so many of my actual clients through these things as well. And so what I'm really here to share with you on this podcast are three different things. Uh, and they're the three parts of the tagline of the podcast. So if you didn't know this the actual full title of the podcast is Breastfeeding talk milk motherhood and mindset and the first point milk.

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:08:06];

Well, that should be kind of obvious Uh, yeah We're obviously talking about breast milk and we're going to be talking about all things boobies And if that makes you uncomfortable, then you should just escort yourself out the door and hit the pause button Unsubscribe and go find yourself a podcast that does appeal to you Um because we're gonna be talking about Boobs.

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:08:23];

We're going to talk about postpartum stuff. We're going to talk about women's bodies. We're going to talk about babies and their poop and all kinds of fun stuff. So stick around. Um, but I also don't want the whole podcast to be about the milk. And I feel like in many ways, when we talk about breastfeeding, how many times have you seen, you know, a company selling a breastfeeding product, even a lactation consultant with a practice, even the name lactation consultant implies that it's just about lactating.

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:08:50];

Um, just about the milk. But breastfeeding is so much more than the milk. It's about our journey as mothers and becoming a mother. And so that's where that second pillar of motherhood comes in, because breastfeeding doesn't just happen in a vacuum. It's not just about the milk. We can't commodify, we can't commoditize breastfeeding.

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:09:11];

Breastfeeding into this nutritional product, right? That's what formula companies do. And that's great. That's what they're there for. That's what they're supposed to be doing. But with breastfeeding, breastfeeding is so much more than the milk and breast feeding can actually be a way of mothering your baby.

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:09:28];

And a lot of people don't see it that way, but when I point that out, they're like, Oh, yeah, because it's about the warmth. It's about the comfort. And there's so much more involved in the actual physical mechanics of breastfeeding that create health for you and your baby besides all the components of the human milk.

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:09:48];

And I feel like both of those factors are just equally important. Now, I do want to clarify something because I don't want any moms who are exclusive pumping moms Or low milk supply moms to feel excluded or feel judged. First of all, it's no judgment here. No judgment whatsoever. Your journey is your journey, and you get to define what that journey looks like.

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:10:12];

That being said, um, I will use the term breastfeeding as an overall umbrella term because I don't wanna get into all, you know, breast milk feeding or you know, all these terms. Let's just understand breastfeeding means feeding human milk in some way, shape, or form for the most part. Um. Some moms really need to pump.

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:10:30];

Some moms pump by choice, whatever it is, right? There's no shame in your game here. So I just want to make that super clear that when I use the word breastfeeding, if, if you're feeling like I'm excluding you because you're not feeding your baby at the breast, please, please don't feel that way. That's not what I mean at all.

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:10:48];

And that brings me to the third point, which is mindset. Mindset's really important. Mindset determines how you interpret things. How you perceive your world. It also determines how you create and shape your world. Because the thoughts that you think and the words that you speak are constantly shaping your own reality.

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:11:10];

Now that includes things in your life like your career, your relationships, and just generally how you show up in the world. It even shapes your experience of breastfeeding. So you might not even realize you have some negative thoughts going around in your mind about breastfeeding, and you don't have to know exactly what those thoughts are, but just know that you can always change your thinking.

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:11:29];

So it's anything in life, you know, if you've been in the personal development world or you're into reading that kind of stuff, I'm sure you're familiar with the https: otter. ai

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:11:45];

Right? Habits, your thoughts, your interpretations of things, your perceptions, all of that. And that's ultimately what creates your reality. So if you're thinking, you know, breastfeeding is impossible. How could I, how could I keep going one more day? Well, that mindset is going to lead to a certain outcome.

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:12:06];

Not saying it's good or bad, just saying what it is. But if you're saying, you know what, if I can just make it one more day, that's, you know, that's, that's amazing. You know, and if you can make it one more day, I can make it another day, and I can make it another day. And when you work from that mindset, there's an entirely different outcome that becomes possible for you.

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:12:25];

And so, your mindset is your possibilities, basically. You get to decide what your possibilities are by deciding what mindset to have. Thank you. And truly anything is possible. So, there's a couple of main themes that I've been sharing on my social media for a while. And if you aren't following me, I'm most active over on Instagram at Holistic Lactation.

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:12:50];

Um, but one of the things is that I love to share at hashtag youcanbreastfeed. Because, um, Anybody can breastfeed. Literally, anybody can breastfeed. And I know there's already going to be some pushback before we get the pushback. I want to tell you what I mean by that. You could have had a double mastectomy, okay?

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:13:11];

But you could put your baby to your chest, and you could feed them with a supplemental tube at your chest. That is called chest feeding, okay? You can do that. You can breastfeed, okay? Like, there's still a way. Now maybe that's an extreme example with low milk supply. Just because you have low milk supply doesn't mean you have no milk supply.

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:13:34];

You've got some, right? You can breastfeed with that low milk supply. You can breastfeed with just one breast. You can, you can breastfeed with your pump. You can breastfeed in so many ways, right? And Most of the time, breastfeeding problems that you're experiencing are fixable. And I feel like this is just not a message that women are told often enough.

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:13:56];

Really, anything in healthcare, for the most part, if you just haven't found the right solution yet, you just haven't found the right provider that knows the solution. Because Nearly everything is fixable. I mean, people are healing themselves of cancer, of diabetes, of, of all these things, unless it's like a rare genetic condition, for the most part, things are fixable, right?

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:14:17];

Neuroplasticity, people that have severed their spine in an accident and were told they'd never walk again, or they were in a coma for 10 years, they wake up. They regain their skills. They can speak. They can move. They can walk again. This is what I'm talking about. Now, those are extreme examples, but your little case of mastitis isn't going to kill your breastfeeding journey.

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:14:38];

It's fixable. Your baby with a tongue tie, it's fixable. Your baby, you know, that's got the worst, like, shark bite latch, it's fixable. You know, there's so many things that I feel like we run into as obstacles, and we're just not told that these things are fixable. But they are. Low milk supply. It's fixable.

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:14:58];

There's a small, small percentage of people that have insufficient glandular tissue, but for the most part, the other reasons why women are having these issues have to do with nutritional status, hormones, and a number of factors, but we can fix those things. So, I want to make this podcast as inspiring, as encouraging, as truthful, as honest, and also as matter of fact as can be.

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:15:25];

Because those are the things that I value, that I have found to be most helpful for my clients. I'm not going to beat around the bush and hide information from you because I think it's going to hurt your feelings. If you don't like something I have to say, you can skip the episode or fast forward or whatever, but I'm not saying it to make you feel bad.

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:15:43];

I'm saying it to give you the information you need to go on and take that information and succeed with it. If I withhold that information and it's something that could help you, I'm actually doing you a massive disservice. At that point, I actually am creating harm. So I don't believe that we are fragile.

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:16:03];

I don't believe that women need the truth covered up for them just so they can feel better. I believe women are smart. I believe women can handle the truth. I believe women want the truth. And I'm not going to be one of those women that does not tell you the truth, but I'm also not going to be one of those women that tells you that I'm better than you because I know more or, you know, whatever.

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:16:28];

I'm not going to judge you on your journey because your journey is your journey. And again, you're creating your journey with your mindset, with your words. You literally, with every moment of your breastfeeding journey, your pregnancy journey, even your preconception journey, you are already creating your breastfeeding experience.

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:16:47];

So I just wanted to clarify that. So again, the three pillars are milk, motherhood, and mindset. I'm gonna get heavy doses of both. I have some incredible interviewees that I'm bringing on the show that I think are just gonna blow your mind. And you're gonna be like, whoa, how did I not know this? Oh my gosh, I wish I had known this sooner.

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:17:06];

So that's why you should subscribe and make sure you don't miss out on any of the episodes. And make sure you share with any moms that you feel like could really use this information. It would help support them. I'd also love for you to, uh, message me over on Instagram. Send me a DM. Let me know your thoughts on any of the episodes that you've listened to.

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:17:24];

If there's something, a topic specific that you want to hear more about, maybe you're also interested in being a guest on the show. Send me a message. We'll send you the link to apply and we can bring you on as an interviewee. Now, the last part I wanted to talk to you guys about as part of this podcast is something that I wanted to create a special gift.

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:17:42];

Something really lovely for all you amazing listeners out there who have supported the show from day one. And even if you have gone back to listen to this first episode because you've listened to later episodes and you never caught the podcast right when it started, you still get access to the special gift

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:18:00];

And it's actually a combination of affirmations and mantras that I've put together for breastfeeding moms. These affirmations are more than just the affirmations that you're going to find on Pinterest or wherever you want to go look up breastfeeding affirmations online. There's some great ones, they're fine, but this is a really comprehensive list and they're designed to do a couple of things.

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:18:22];

One, they're designed to really support you on your breastfeeding journey, to inspire you, to encourage you, to help relax you, to keep going, to motivate you. But they're also designed to create the words in your mind, the thoughts in your mind that will lead to your breastfeeding success. So it's almost kind of like hypnosis, but not quite.

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:18:45];

It's kind of like a meditation and I've got some beautiful meditative music in the background of the audio recording of the breastfeeding affirmations. And it's a free gift to you. So you can actually go to my website right now. Holistic lactation. com slash mantras. You can download that it's free for you.

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:19:03];

And as a bonus, I also have a beautiful PDF that goes along with it. So if you're one of those people that just wants to have something visual to look at, maybe you want to hang it up in your nursery. Look at it on your phone while you're nursing. Maybe you want to listen to the affirmations while you're sitting down to breastfeed your baby.

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:19:19];

That's what this is designed for. It's designed to support you in your success with breastfeeding. Now, while it's totally fine and encouraged, breastfeeding For you to listen to this podcast in your car while you're driving, it's not encouraged for you to listen to the affirmations while you're driving, because you might get a little too relaxed.

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:19:37];

And if you're like most moms, you might be a little sleep deprived, and that's not a good combination while you're trying to operate a vehicle or any kind of heavy machinery. So there's my disclaimer for that, but I'd love for you to go check it out. Go listen. If you love it, send me a message. I'd love to hear from you.

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:19:55];

Uh, and you can find me over on Instagram. Like I said, Uh, and so the last thing I wanted to say was, it means so much to me that you're here as a founding listener to this podcast, truly, truly, truly it does, because this podcast is for you. It is not for me. It is not the Jacqueline Kincer show. It is the breastfeeding talk podcast.

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:20:15];

And we're here to talk about all things breastfeeding, the milk, the motherhood, the mindset, all of it is there. And I want it to really be for you. This is supposed to be a place of encouragement. It's really a culmination and a combination of things that I wish that I heard, had access to whatever before I had kids.

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:20:37];

Once I gave birth, I really wish that there was something like this for me to tune into something that didn't require my eyes to read text in a book or on a screen, and then just put me to sleep. So, If this sounds like something that you're into, make sure you've hit subscribed. Make sure you listen to future episodes.

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:20:56];

I've got episode two, which is about how breastfeeding shouldn't hurt. And if you are triggered by that phrase and you're like, what the heck? Breastfeeding totally hurt me. That episode is for you. Go take a listen. And episode number three, I've got an amazing interview with a postpartum fitness trainer, Beverly Simpson.

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:21:16];

She's the founder of the 30 minute method and be Simpson fitness. And she is sharing some incredible things about your postpartum body and fitness and getting your body back and into a fitness routine, losing the baby weight. We get into the nitty gritty folks, and you are not going to want to miss that episode.

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:21:35];

So make sure you listen to that as well. And I will see you on the next episode. Thanks so much for tuning in. Did you know most moms stop breastfeeding in the first month postpartum? I believe succeeding at breastfeeding means having the right mindset. In fact, studies show that the number one factor that determines breastfeeding success is.

 

Jacqueline Kincer; [00:21:59];

 Is commitment, which is why I've created my incredible audio download of breastfeeding affirmations, where I give you actionable mantras so you can breastfeed your baby with confidence and peace of mind. And best of all, it's free to get access to this audio and PDF, simply visit holistic lactation. com slash mantras, and you can get started right now.